geenoway: (nakedfrank)
[personal profile] geenoway
Title: Here Comes the Sun
Author: [livejournal.com profile] vamplover82
Pairing: Jon/Brendon
Rating: PG
Summary: Brendon’s and Jon’s thoughts on Jon joining the band.
Disclaimer: I don’t own the guys Panic at the Disco, and this certainly isn’t true.
Author notes: Comments and con crit. are much appreciated. Written as a comment fic at [livejournal.com profile] anon_lovefest.



Brendon's POV

Brendon knows that it hasn't all been bad, and it hasn't been like this for nearly as long as it sometimes seems. But the thing is, Brent seems to be slowly pulling away from them, has been doing so for awhile, and it's made everything feel wrong.

Spencer is extra bitchy, and not just to Brent. 'Ice Queen' is the term Brendon always thinks of when Spencer gets into one of his moods. Ryan tends to be moody and stand-offish in general, clearly not happy but obviously trying to keep his cool when things get tense. Brendon has taken it upon himself to try his best to be cheery, even when nothing seems to be going right. His smile is often faked because, well, it's hard to manage a real smile when it feels like there's a winter chill coming from all directions.

And then one day, it's the straight-up coldest day of the year (metaphorically speaking anyway, since it's actually pretty warm, being May and all) because Brent completely fails to be there when he's supposed to for one of their shows. They're able to get someone to fill in during the show, but everyone is pretty pissed off with the situation.

Things blow up after that, and they end up essentially kicking Brent out of the band. Somehow, though, Ryan manages to get Jon, who really had done a great job filling in for Brent, to agree to join the band. And of course, things don't magically get better just because they have a new bassist. The thing is, though, that Brendon actually can see them getting better, albeit gradually.

Spencer starts to calm down, thaw out toward life and the world, or whatever, exactly, he was mad at. Ryan begins to act more like his old self, too, talking more, goofing around, and actually smiling once in awhile. Brendon himself doesn't have to force the cheerfulness nearly as much, and his smiles start to feel less fake, until one day, he's smiling at Jon as they're playing together, and he realizes that he hasn't actually had to fake a smile in months. This, he thinks, might be a minor miracle.

As Brendon messes up horribly, not only playing the wrong chord, but also missing his cue to sing, they all just stop. And instead of frosty silence as there might have been before, now Brendon and Jon are laughing, Ryan is trying not to smile, and Spencer is frowning in a way that Brendon knows means he isn't really upset at all but is still trying to be disapproving about such a bad slip-up.

Brendon feels warm and comfortable, and he thinks that Jon is like the sun; one day he came into their lives, and ever since that day, the ice has been melting and winter has been receding. Spring is coming, and life has never looked better. Brendon thinks that maybe he's a little bit in love with Jon.



Jon's POV

Jon doesn't know what to think when Ryan asks him to be the bassist for Panic. He was glad to help them out when Brent hadn't shown up, but he just doesn't know if he wants to take it on full-time. Ultimately he decides that he likes the band and the guys, and he really has no reason at all to say no. So he says yes.

At first, things are a bit prickly. Spencer seems awfully wary of him and is prone to outbursts if things don't go the way they should. Jon isn't too worried about this since it's obviously a reaction to the problems they were having with Brent. He's generally easy-going enough to ignore it when Spencer overreacts to something. And he's right not to worry; as time goes on and Spencer sees that Jon can actually be counted upon to be where he's supposed to be and do what he's supposed to do, he mellows out considerably and freaks out only occasionally, when it's really warranted.

Ryan, though he was the one to ask Jon to join them, is actually the one who talks to Jon the least. Jon thinks that maybe he understands. Ryan tends to keep to himself more when he's around people he doesn't know so well anyway, and after their problems with Brent, he could easily be trying to keep his distance from Jon so as not to be too attached if it doesn't work out. Whatever the reason, though, as Spencer gets calmer, Ryan seems to get more talkative, and pretty soon Jon realizes that Ryan talks to him as much as he talks to either of the others.

Brendon is Jon's favorite. Not that he'd ever admit that to anyone, but that doesn't stop it being true. Brendon always had a smile and a friendly conversation for him, even in the very beginning. Jon isn't sure he'd have stuck it out with them if Brendon hadn't been there, isn't sure he'd have even wanted to. But Brendon was and is still there, always with that same smile (although he knows now that it's a lot less fake than it used to be) and more often than not, a hug to go along with it.

Jon isn't sure when he fell for Brendon, but one day they're playing together and Brendon fucks up completely, and all Jon can do is laugh with delight. Brendon is laughing right along with him while Ryan hides a smile and Spencer huffs in annoyance, and Jon feels truly and completely at home. And later, when Jon can't help but kiss Brendon as they're cuddled up together on the couch in Ryan's living room, he knows that it'll all work out. Brendon's kissing him back like there's no tomorrow while Ryan and Spencer pretend not to notice, and really, who could ask for more?

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